★★★★

Man.

Stinky copaganda? Yes Admits US culpability in war crimes throughout the Middle East? Yes Makes cops and troops look good? Yes Makes cops and troops look bad? Yes Makes it clear cops have too much money? Yes Makes it clear they need more money? Yes Flat comedic moments that feel totally inappropriate for the moment? Yes Genuinely funny shit throughout the whole thing? Yes Generic boring ass filmmaking? Yes Michael Bay a singular auteur voice that comes through in subtle and unsubtle ways? Yes Amazing tension and pacing? Yes Jump cuts and shaky cam that make it impossible to tell what’s happening? Yes Cheap and shitty looking at times? Yes Insane stunts and technical achievements? Yes Terrible acting? Yes Great acting and actors? Yes Racial caricatures that feel dated and out of place? Yes Pretty good cultural representation from women and minorities? Sure! Characters constantly talking about other Michael Bay movies? Yup

This might be the MOST Michael Bay movie of all time. I think I really liked it though honestly. Much less offensive to me than a bad boys or a transformers.